If you want to read my stories in chronological order, this is how it goes:

All Is Full of Love [link]
The Best of Both Worlds [link]
The Vinculus Charm [link]
The Hypocritic Oath [link]
The Last Night [link]
The Wisher [link]
Vengeance [link]
Meg Valance [link]
Yesterday's Slug Club [link]
The Forest [link]
The Slytherin Common Room [link]
Narcissa Black [link]
Hemlock and Vanilla [link]
Knockturn Alley [link]
Spilt Milk, Part One [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Two [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Three [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Four [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Five [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Six [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Seven [link]
A Single Candle [link]
Blue Satin [link]
Rosura [link]
Rosura, Part Two [link]
Rosura, Part Three [link]
Rosura, Part Four [link]
Rosura, Part Five [link]
Rosura, Part Six [link]
Rosura, Part Seven [link]
Where the Action Is [link]
Rosura, Part Eight [link]
Splintered [link]
Torn [link]
The Green-Eyed Monster [link]
The Corona [link]
Professor Caladrius [link]
Divination [link]
The Plan [link]
Furious Calm [link]
Full Fathom Five [link]
The Descent, Part One [link]
The Descent, Part Two [link]
A Taste of Things to Come [link]
A Taste of Thing to Come II [link]
Curly Hair, Feathers and Flame [link]
The Porcelain Bitch [link]
A Little Corner of Paradise [link]
A Means to Nothing [link]
A Beautiful Accident [link]
Less Broken [link]
Two Romantic Reunions [link]
Constructive Agony [link]
White in the Moon [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part One [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part Two [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part 3 [link]
Monochrome [link]
Foe Fire [link]
Jaded [link]
Possession [link]
A Wife, a Mother, and a Corpse [link]
Damage Limitation [link]
The Viceberg [link]
The Cavalry [link]
Otherworldly [link]
The Thaw [link]
The Angel in the Ice [link]
The Loose End [link]
Spinning Plates [link]
Spinning Plates, Part Two [link]
The Fall [link]
The Rise [link]
Sympathetic Magic [link]
Once Upon a Time [link]
The Soulless Redhead [link]
Happily Ever After [link]
Sanctuary [link]
Never, Never, Never Land [link]
Day and Night [link]
Smoke [link]
Shades of Red [link]
The Man who Lived [link]
Rosemary [link]
Pandora's Box [link]
The Witch and the Wardrobe [link]
Smouldering [link]
Miss Morgan [link]
Notes on the Bad Guy [link]
The Nightmare Guide [link]
Creepers [link]
Another Argument [link]
Darkling [link]

And stories that aren't really part of the main plot yet, but hopefully will be someday, when I get my ass in gear:

Night Ramblings [link]
The Dark Snitch [link]
Always Winter, Never Christmas [link]
Potions [link]
The Goddess of Death [link]
The Goddess of Waking [link]
Scars [link]
Comfort and Joy [link]

I get that question a lot. Here’s my favourite version of it, as posed by my dad:

“Have you ever considered thinking up your own characters, Lucy? Or is that too difficult?”

If you looked at my life – my actual life, not the periods of it that I spend in fictional universes or on the internet – you might ask the same question.

On the face of it, it looks as though I’m writing fanfiction for nothing other than the opportunity to get embarrassed when I’m talking to my colleagues at work. I know this will result in awkwardness, but I can neither stop writing the fanfiction, nor stop talking about it. All the things I’ve described: eyebrow raises, slow-okays – I have been greeted with every one of those. I’ve barely succeeded in outlining the shadow of how embarrassing some of these encounters were. Really, they have broken my spirit so much that I tell people about my hobby with an apologetic smile on my face. I don’t even have the nerve to be proud of what I am any more. I’m adrift on a sea of polite disdain. And yet, I can’t stop mentioning it. It’s the only thing I like to talk about – it’s certainly the only thing I can talk even remotely knowledgeably about.

Do I just want to make things difficult for myself? Or is this genuinely not a thing to be ashamed of?

Am I fighting against prejudice? Is this one of those genuine crusades, like gay rights? Or is it one of those misled, pervy crusades, like zoophile rights? I know in my heart that I haven’t done anything wrong. But so, probably, do the people who really have done something wrong. That’s the problem with your conscience. It’s all you have to go on, but it can be notoriously untrustworthy. It’s a product of evolution, just like everything else, and so it’s always trying to make things easier for you.

Is writing with somebody else’s characters so bad? Hasn’t the best art in the world been about working within constraints? Nobody would say the sonnet was lazy and derivative, just because it always has fourteen lines and ends in a rhyming couplet. Nobody would say Shakespeare was just acting out his fantasies when he wrote about Anthony and Cleopatra.

My favourite comedians, Daniel Kitson and Josie Long, are in love with the ideal of heroic failure. They love it when people make the effort, especially when the effort is so disproportionate to the actual result. It’s the same with Severus Snape. I love the idea that, throughout the entire series, he’s exerting every fibre of his being just to keep himself from strangling Harry Potter. Nobody would say, after reading the books, that he was trying to be nice to Harry. But they don’t understand where he started from. They don’t appreciate the current he had to swim against. All that cruelty is actually the end result of a lifelong campaign not to be a bastard. The effort doesn’t match the results, but I still find it stunning.

I’m not in love with the idea of heroic failure for myself, though. I much prefer the idea of heroic success. Maybe that isn’t possible, but I’d like to give it a try.

Anyway, I wanted to talk about reading. I love reading because it brings me into contact with details and perspectives that would never have occurred to me in a million years. Every time you read, it broadens your horizons. Every time you go to Hogwarts, or Narnia, or Lilliput, you bring something back with you. A souvenir. Sometimes it’s just a word. Sometimes it’s a whole, glorious epiphany.

Every time Machiavelli sat down to read, he would dress in the period costume of the author he was reading. If he was reading Plato, he’d put on a toga. And then he would set a place at his table for the author. I love this idea that, when you’re reading, you’re actually having the author round for dinner.

I especially love it because it reminds me of a comedy sketch in Important Things with Demetri Martin where a boy actually does get to have dinner with his heroes – Benjamin Franklin, Shakespeare and Galileo – and they’re complete dicks. They’re rude to the waitress; they make filthy jokes; and they don’t want to talk about their high-minded theories or past achievements.

I know I have a habit of doing this, but I’m going to include another link to Paul’s blog. Before I do, I’ll tell you that he’s writing about the fact that he walked to work through the rain yesterday morning. Imagine where he might take this subject. I guarantee, you will not be able to predict where he eventually goes with it. [link]

Fanfiction is special because you know that the writers are also readers. You know you have something in common with them before you even start. You both love J.K. Rowling’s books. But this common-ground can be like quicksand. Sometimes you discover they’ve come to completely different conclusions about the books you’ve both loved. Sometimes you find out they have completely different visions of the characters.

That’s OK, because it fosters debate. Fanfiction doesn’t have the absolute authority that other works of fiction do, because you know they’re just extensions and interpretations of somebody else’s work. As such, it always involves dialogue. It’s a dialogue with J.K. Rowling and it’s a dialogue between her fans. It’s writing that can answer back. And that’s why it’s so much fun. At one and the same time, it’s a quiet evening in, and a big, scary party.

The real reason I write fanfiction is bewitchingly simple. It’s because, every once in a while, someone tells me that they like it. I can’t describe how happy that makes me, so I won’t try. And I like to think that, even if it happened very infrequently, the occasions when it did happen would be enough to keep me doing it. I like to think that, but I don’t know, because everyone on this website has been incredibly kind, and I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it.

And all this brings me to the fact that my chapter ‘Scars’ won second runner-up in *northangel27’s wonderful Snapely contest. I want to thank her and all the judges for their kindness.

Also, please check out my friend ~FlameoftheWest7’s fanfic about the wedding of Narcissa Black and Lucius Malfoy. It’s beautifully-written, exotically-detailed, and the characters are so canon, and so entertaining, that reading it is like meeting up with old friends.

If you want to read my stories in chronological order, this is how it goes:

All Is Full of Love [link]
The Best of Both Worlds [link]
The Vinculus Charm [link]
The Hypocritic Oath [link]
The Last Night [link]
The Wisher [link]
Vengeance [link]
Meg Valance [link]
Yesterday's Slug Club [link]
The Forest [link]
The Slytherin Common Room [link]
Narcissa Black [link]
Hemlock and Vanilla [link]
Knockturn Alley [link]
Spilt Milk, Part One [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Two [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Three [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Four [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Five [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Six [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Seven [link]
A Single Candle [link]
Blue Satin [link]
Rosura [link]
Rosura, Part Two [link]
Rosura, Part Three [link]
Rosura, Part Four [link]
Rosura, Part Five [link]
Rosura, Part Six [link]
Rosura, Part Seven [link]
Where the Action Is [link]
Rosura, Part Eight [link]
Splintered [link]
Torn [link]
The Green-Eyed Monster [link]
The Corona [link]
Professor Caladrius [link]
Divination [link]
The Plan [link]
Furious Calm [link]
Full Fathom Five [link]
The Descent, Part One [link]
The Descent, Part Two [link]
A Taste of Things to Come [link]
A Taste of Thing to Come II [link]
Curly Hair, Feathers and Flame [link]
The Porcelain Bitch [link]
A Little Corner of Paradise [link]
A Means to Nothing [link]
A Beautiful Accident [link]
Less Broken [link]
Two Romantic Reunions [link]
Constructive Agony [link]
White in the Moon [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part One [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part Two [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part 3 [link]
Monochrome [link]
Foe Fire [link]
Jaded [link]
Possession [link]
A Wife, a Mother, and a Corpse [link]
Damage Limitation [link]
The Viceberg [link]
The Cavalry [link]
Otherworldly [link]
The Thaw [link]
The Angel in the Ice [link]
The Loose End [link]
Spinning Plates [link]
Spinning Plates, Part Two [link]
The Fall [link]
The Rise [link]
Sympathetic Magic [link]
Once Upon a Time [link]
The Soulless Redhead [link]
Happily Ever After [link]
Sanctuary [link]
Never, Never, Never Land [link]
Day and Night [link]
Smoke [link]
Shades of Red [link]
The Man who Lived [link]
Rosemary [link]
Pandora's Box [link]
The Witch and the Wardrobe [link]
Smouldering [link]
Miss Morgan [link]
Notes on the Bad Guy [link]
The Nightmare Guide [link]

And stories that aren't really part of the main plot yet, but hopefully will be someday, when I get my ass in gear:

Night Ramblings [link]
The Dark Snitch [link]
Always Winter, Never Christmas [link]
Potions [link]
The Goddess of Death [link]
The Goddess of Waking [link]
Scars [link]

I’ve been at work today, knocking back coffee like a fifties Wall-Street executive with his bottle of Jack Daniels –grimacing and shuddering with every gulp. I like pretending that my job is much more stressful than it actually is.

“Jesus, Margery, you mean this has gotta be on the stock-market by Friday? I’m already having three affairs, developing a gambling problem, and persecuting my teenage son for his burgeoning homosexuality – whatta they expect me to do? Get me another scotch!”

In reality, I trawl round the building’s libraries, checking Middle English quotations, and avoiding responsibility of any kind. In fact, even this can stress me out. I was hurrying back from my tea break last week and I passed a poster on the noticeboard - I still don’t know what it was about, but the headline was: ‘Is there more to life than this?’ and my immediate, instinctive response was: ‘If there is, I shall have to investigate it outside of working hours’.

I haven’t been very active on DeviantArt for the past week, because my internet connection isn’t working at home, leaving me with the extremely naughty option of writing this journal at my desk at work.

Losing your internet connection is like having the biggest window in your house bricked up. I don’t just miss the view. I miss leaning out of the window and chatting to people. I miss breathing on the window and writing stupid messages in the condensation. I miss opening it and being able to breathe. I miss leaving pies to cool on the window-sill. OK, this metaphor may have got a bit silly now. Now I’m just naming activities that you can do with windows. I miss mooning my neighbours and throwing rotten fruit at the local hoodies? I should really stop.

The internet always reminds me of the Philip Larkin poem 'High Windows', which I’m not sure how to quote, because it has a fantastic bit of swearing in its first few lines. I don’t want to get into trouble. This week, more than any other, has taught me that people can be touchy. So, in an effort to spare all those bright-eyed, rosy-cheeked, eight-year-old Harry Potter fans any trauma, I’ll amend the swearing, even though this will probably entail some kind of curse from a furious (albeit dead) Philip Larkin. I wonder why we assume that the dead are more likely to curse us than the living.

When I see a couple of kids
And guess he's f***ing her and she's
Taking pills or wearing a diaphragm,
I know this is paradise

Everyone old has dreamed of all their lives--
Bonds and gestures pushed to one side
Like an outdated combine harvester,
And everyone young going down the long slide

To happiness, endlessly. I wonder if
Anyone looked at me, forty years back,
And thought, That'll be the life;
No God any more, or sweating in the dark

About hell and that, or having to hide
What you think of the priest. He
And his lot will all go down the long slide
Like free bloody birds. And immediately

Rather than words comes the thought of high windows:
The sun-comprehending glass,
And beyond it, the deep blue air, that shows
Nothing, and is nowhere, and is endless.

That’s what the internet always seems like to me. It’s filthy, but it’s free. You can say anything and be anyone. Of course, there are downsides to freedom too, and that brings me to the other interesting thing that happened to me this week. Some people can take advantage of this anonymity to be cruel. And it’s the sheer time commitment involved that I find staggering. You’d think, if moral considerations wouldn’t deter these people, maybe laziness would. Going to the trouble of writing a whole journal about the unworthiness of somebody else’s work is at least half an hour out of your day. That’s like going to the trouble of learning a whole other language just so that you can insult somebody in their native tongue. That kind of effort, even if it’s phenomenally misplaced, is actually kind of sweet. I feel like a parent who’s just been presented with a home-made death threat by her four-year-old.

“Julie gave me a hand with the scissors, but otherwise it’s all my own work. I even found a picture of you and cut it up, so it looks like your head’s been chopped off.”

“That’s… lovely, Jamie. I can’t believe you found all the words for: ‘Die screaming with bits of glass in your head’ in the paper.’

I have the wildest urge to print out this journal and stick it up on the fridge, as a monument to spiteful persistence.

But it hasn’t upset me. If the criticism had been more intelligent, it might have done but, as it was, I was just left with the impression that either a) this guy hadn’t actually read my chapter or b) he was scraping the bottom of the barrel for possible sources of abuse. Saying that my story has flat writing and bad characterization is not just incorrect, but entirely meaningless. What is flat writing? How do you characterize bad characterization? Maybe he thought he was sparing me any detailed abuse (how sweet of him), but, in reality, he was making me feel better about the whole thing.

Now that this guy/girl’s views have been given a fair hearing, I’m going to remove the comment from my story. Initially, I didn’t want to, because I hadn’t done anything wrong, and hiding the comment felt like a defensive act. But this chapter, while it probably isn’t my best, doesn’t deserve to be associated with this person’s mean-spirited jealousy, so the comment is coming down and, hopefully, we can all get on with our lives. Thank you so much to everyone who sent me messages of support during the past week. Let me assure you that I’m fine, that I haven’t taken this unkindness to heart, and that it could never make me stop writing.

(To stop this journal being too down-beat, I'll end by sharing another of Paul’s fabulous tweets, hot off the press:

If you think the minotaur is big, you should see the MAJORTAUR!!)

If you want to read my stories in chronological order, this is how it goes:

All Is Full of Love [link]
The Best of Both Worlds [link]
The Vinculus Charm [link]
The Hypocritic Oath [link]
The Last Night [link]
The Wisher [link]
Vengeance [link]
Meg Valance [link]
Yesterday's Slug Club [link]
The Forest [link]
The Slytherin Common Room [link]
Narcissa Black [link]
Hemlock and Vanilla [link]
Knockturn Alley [link]
Night Ramblings [link]
Spilt Milk, Part One [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Two [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Three [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Four [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Five [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Six [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Seven [link]
A Single Candle [link]
The Dark Snitch [link]
Blue Satin [link]
Rosura [link]
Rosura, Part Two [link]
Rosura, Part Three [link]
Rosura, Part Four [link]
Rosura, Part Five [link]
Rosura, Part Six [link]
Rosura, Part Seven [link]
Where the Action Is [link]
Rosura, Part Eight [link]
Splintered [link]
Torn [link]
The Green-Eyed Monster [link]
The Corona [link]
Professor Caladrius [link]
Divination [link]
The Plan [link]
Furious Calm [link]
Full Fathom Five [link]
The Descent, Part One [link]
The Descent, Part Two [link]
A Taste of Things to Come [link]
A Taste of Thing to Come II [link]
Curly Hair, Feathers and Flame [link]
The Porcelain Bitch [link]
A Little Corner of Paradise [link]
A Means to Nothing [link]
A Beautiful Accident [link]
Less Broken [link]
Two Romantic Reunions [link]
Constructive Agony [link]
White in the Moon [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part One [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part Two [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part 3 [link]
Monochrome [link]
Foe Fire [link]
Jaded [link]
Possession [link]
A Wife, a Mother, and a Corpse [link]
Damage Limitation [link]
The Viceberg [link]
The Cavalry [link]
Otherworldly [link]
The Thaw [link]
The Angel in the Ice [link]
The Loose End [link]
Spinning Plates [link]
Spinning Plates, Part Two [link]
The Fall [link]
The Rise [link]
Sympathetic Magic [link]
Once Upon a Time [link]
The Soulless Redhead [link]
Happily Ever After [link]
Sanctuary [link]
Never, Never, Never Land [link]
Day and Night [link]
Smoke [link]
Shades of Red [link]
The Man who Lived [link]
Rosemary [link]
Pandora's Box [link]
The Witch and the Wardrobe [link]
Smouldering [link]
Miss Morgan [link]

And stories that aren't really part of the main plot yet, but hopefully will be someday, when I get my ass in gear:

Always Winter, Never Christmas [link]
Potions [link]
The Goddess of Death [link]
The Goddess of Waking [link]

I'm sorry, dear, patient, lovely people of DeviantArt, that it has been so long since I posted a journal here. I've tried to write one many times. I have a whole collection of what I call 'journal stubs', which are the beginnings of journals that I decided were too irrelevant, self-indulgent or just plain crazy to post. You want to see one? Here:

'I’m just letting my fingers play over the keys. Something meaningful is bound to come out eventually. I imagine this is really annoying my boyfriend, who is sitting at the other side of the table, being properly creative: stroking his beard and making clever, considered observations while I appear to be in the grip of some creative epiphany, tapping away at my keyboard with all the inevitability of an avalanche.'

Needless to say, nothing especially creative came out of that exercise. Paul was stroking his beard and making clever, considered observations long after I'd given up and switched on the TV. (For anyone who wants to see the written result of all this beard-stroking, there is a particularly fine example here: [link] )

Sometimes, I just start to write, in the hope that something good will happen. It's entirely random. And, even if something good does happen, I won't necessarily recognize it as good, because it is my instinct to assume that everything I write, think or say is bad (not morally bad - just slightly pathetic, which I suppose is worse. When 'bad' can't even be spectacularly bad, it's really bad.)

You see, now I'm wondering if this will end up as a journal stub. But it can't, because I've got proper news this time. I'm not allowed to give up and switch on the TV (even if there is an episode of Time Team I haven't seen on More4! They're all the same, anyway: 1) Dig trench, 2) Find pottery in trench, 3) Explain that pottery isn't quite as ancient as they thought it was, 4) End up in the pub, covered in mud, talking about how frustrating Archaeology is and why they really need a holiday. That last part isn't true, but I'd like to see it!)

Anyway, the news is this. Inspired by =northangel27's wonderful Snapely Contest (details of which can be found here [link] ), and the kind remarks of readers, I wondered whether anyone was interested in entering a contest to draw/ paint/ write about my OC, Bruiser Thuggle, the Invincible Muggle.

~Melorik has very kindly offered to donate a 3-month Premium Membership subscription to the best piece of art featuring this character, and I’ll write a fanfiction for the winner, based on the pairing/theme/subject of their choice. I’ll feature them in my journal too (although that is a dubious distinction, given the number of page-views I receive per day!)

Any traditional art, digital art, or photo manipulations would be welcome (even fanfictions would be very cool! I'll make a separate category for fan-fictions, and I'll give the fan-fiction winner a 3-Month Premium Membership subscription, and a fanfiction based on the pairing/ theme/ subject of their choice too).

Anatomically, I imagine Bruiser would be quite difficult to draw, because he’s knotted with muscles and crisscrossed with scars. He’s about 50-ish, has blonde hair flecked with grey, mischievous blue eyes, and he is usually topless (regular readers may well be spotting a pattern here...) although, recently, he has taken to wearing a well-pressed muggle suit as he struts over the cobble-stones of Diagon Alley.

For anyone who hasn’t read the story, but still wants to enter the contest, I’ve tried to pick out the most Bruiser-heavy chapters, to give you an idea of his character:

Where The Action Is: [link]
Less Broken: [link]
Two Romantic Reunions: [link]
The Angel in the Ice: [link]
The Man Who Lived: [link]
Smouldering: [link]

Just let me know if you’re interested. Closing date can be 5th December (giving a whole three months for submissions). I've never run a contest before, so, if there's anything I've left out, please let me know.

If you want to read my stories in chronological order, this is how it goes:

All Is Full of Love [link]
The Best of Both Worlds [link]
The Vinculus Charm [link]
The Hypocritic Oath [link]
The Last Night [link]
The Wisher [link]
Vengeance [link]
Meg Valance [link]
Yesterday's Slug Club [link]
The Forest [link]
The Slytherin Common Room [link]
Narcissa Black [link]
Hemlock and Vanilla [link]
Knockturn Alley [link]
Night Ramblings [link]
Spilt Milk, Part One [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Two [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Three [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Four [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Five [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Six [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Seven [link]
A Single Candle [link]
The Dark Snitch [link]
Blue Satin [link]
Rosura [link]
Rosura, Part Two [link]
Rosura, Part Three [link]
Rosura, Part Four [link]
Rosura, Part Five [link]
Rosura, Part Six [link]
Rosura, Part Seven [link]
Where the Action Is [link]
Rosura, Part Eight [link]
Splintered [link]
Torn [link]
The Green-Eyed Monster [link]
The Corona [link]
Professor Caladrius [link]
Divination [link]
The Plan [link]
Furious Calm [link]
Full Fathom Five [link]
The Descent, Part One [link]
The Descent, Part Two [link]
A Taste of Things to Come [link]
A Taste of Thing to Come II [link]
Curly Hair, Feathers and Flame [link]
The Porcelain Bitch [link]
A Little Corner of Paradise [link]
A Means to Nothing [link]
A Beautiful Accident [link]
Less Broken [link]
Two Romantic Reunions [link]
Constructive Agony [link]
White in the Moon [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part One [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part Two [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part 3 [link]
Monochrome [link]
Foe Fire [link]
Jaded [link]
Possession [link]
A Wife, a Mother, and a Corpse [link]
Damage Limitation [link]
The Viceberg [link]
The Cavalry [link]
Otherworldly [link]
The Thaw [link]
The Angel in the Ice [link]
The Loose End [link]
Spinning Plates [link]
Spinning Plates, Part Two [link]
The Fall [link]
The Rise [link]
Sympathetic Magic [link]
Once Upon a Time [link]
The Soulless Redhead [link]
Happily Ever After [link]
Sanctuary [link]
Never, Never, Never Land [link]
Day and Night [link]
Smoke [link]
Shades of Red [link]
The Man who Lived [link]
Rosemary [link]
Pandora's Box [link]
The Witch and the Wardrobe [link]
Smouldering [link]

And stories that aren't really part of the main plot yet, but hopefully will be someday, when I get my ass in gear:

Always Winter, Never Christmas [link]
Potions [link]
The Goddess of Death [link]
The Goddess of Waking [link]

Some beautiful watercolours from my (very limited) travels on this amazing website!



Also, I've been tagged for a quiz by *mybreathingselfagain! This is lucky, because I’ve been trying to write a new journal entry for ages, but I kept getting discouraged by the fact that I had absolutely nothing to say. In answering this quiz, I've realized that I still technically have nothing to say, but at least I've been legitimately asked. And maybe the sheer extent of the dullness in my life will prove entertaining, like the world's most boring circus freak-show. (You know, if it wasn't my own life, I would probably pay to see it! )

1.) Take the book you´re reading (at the moment), open it on page 18 and write down the 4th sentence.

'And that's twenty miles'.

Terry Pratchett's The Fifth Elephant (I'm sorry, it's mostly dialogue! Difficult to get a good idea about the book from that. But at least you know now where I get my habit of writing in short sentences from!)

2.) Pull out your left hand as far as you can, - what is it you find?

A letter from the bank. Happily, it is not addressed to me.

3.) What was the last thing you´ve seen on TV?

Tim Minchin's stand-up show (oh, it was amazing! I can't recommend it enough! Check him out on Youtube: [link] , but probably best to make sure the kids are out of the room first).

4.) Don´t look at a clock – and tell the time!

6:47

5.) Now look at a clock and tell the time!

6:34 (Hooray! Thirteen extra minutes free! Unfortunately, I have to spend them doing the washing-up, which is next on my to-do list)

6.) What do you hear at the moment (except the PC)?

The sound of the wind in the trees and my boyfriend laughing at the Twitter page.

7.) When did you last time leaving your home and what for?

This morning, for work. But, before that, not since Friday (I'm a total recluse at weekends!)

8.) Before you started answering these questions, what did you look at?

My messages on DeviantArt.

9.) What clothes you´re wearing right now?

My work trousers and a blue vest-top. I feel like Ripley from Alien.

10.) Do you remember your dream of last night?

Yes, and, for once, I'm quite proud of it. I was choosing an engagement ring, but, for some reason, we were in a terrible rush, so I just chose the first one that came to hand, a ring with a massive diamond the size of a grape. I was still wearing this ring in my next dream, where it transpired that it was great for punching zombies with - like an extremely fancy knuckle-duster. (My boyfriend won't like me relating this dream, because we've been going out for seven years and we're not planning on getting married any time soon, but at least he'll know that I have a great left-hook as well as expensive taste in jewellery and a seemingly overwhelming subconscious desire to get married!)

11.) When did you laugh at the last time?

When I read Paul's first Tweet of the day. Here it is, for the curious:

'Had mini-pasties, mini-eggs, and mini-chocolate doughnuts today. Later I'm planning on having a mini-heart attack. Stupid elves' picnic.'

12.) What do you have on the wall in your room?

So much cool stuff! A comic-book illustration of my story that my sister had one of her friends draw for my birthday (it's so cool! It's of Severus and Lily casting the Vinculus Charm in the Great Hall and temporarily blinding everybody!), a printout of Northangel's 'All I have Become' [link] , a poster of David Mack's Kabuki, a print of Munch's 'Madonna', Van Gogh's 'Church at Auvers', and Blake's 'Hell, Canto 1', a Frank Miller Daredevil poster, and a poster advertising Ben Kweller's latest album (the last two are Paul's contributions to the decor, but they're cool!)

13.) Do you watch something freakish?

Whenever I get the chance! There isn't a lot of freakishness about these days. I blame the economic recession.

14.) What are you thinking about this test?

That my answers are boring. But I will think that during any test, quiz, exam or even conversation.

15.) What was the last movie you have seen?

Oh dear. It was 'Fantastic Four II: The Rise of the Silver Surfer'. But right before that: Vertigo. Doesn't that rescue my credibility a little bit? The contrast was fantastic, I can tell you. From a subtle, thrilling, slow-paced, creepy movie, to an elastic man and a planet-devouring monster. I have a weakness for things that are fun and well-meaning (and comic-book based).

16.) If you were a zillionaire, what do you want to buy?

Not a lot, really. A nice house each for my brother, sister and parents. Total immunity from work for myself and my boyfriend, so we could spend our time doing the creative things we love, rather than sitting in an air-conditioned office, listening to the slow death-rattle of our souls.

17.) Tell me something about you I don´t know yet.

I work on the Oxford English Dictionary. And I am still not sure about the difference between a transitive and an intransitive verb.

18.) If you could change one thing in the world – independent of guilt or policy – what would it be?

A cure for cancer would be nice.

19.) Do you like to dance?

Yes, but not in public.

20.) George Bush?

You have to ask?

21.) Imagine your first baby will be a girl, - what will her name be?

Jasmine or Holly.

22.) Imagine your first baby will be a boy, - what will his name be?

Michael.

23.) Do you think about living in another country?

Yes! I'd like to be an academic at an American or Canadian university, because a) the English accent makes you sound as though you know what you're talking about over there, even when you quite obviously don't, and b) I could go to comic-book conventions and eat blueberry pancakes (not necessarily at the same time, but I wouldn't shy away from that challenge either!)

24.) What is it you want to hear from God standing on Heavens Gate?

Surprise! I exist! But you were right to follow your conscience, and respect people rather than judging them. I can't tell you how many people got that one wrong! I just let them in anyway, though, because it seems mean to make anyone go to hell.

If you want to read my stories in chronological order, this is how it goes:

All Is Full of Love [link]
The Best of Both Worlds [link]
The Vinculus Charm [link]
The Hypocritic Oath [link]
The Last Night [link]
The Wisher [link]
Vengeance [link]
Meg Valance [link]
Yesterday's Slug Club [link]
The Forest [link]
The Slytherin Common Room [link]
Narcissa Black [link]
Hemlock and Vanilla [link]
Knockturn Alley [link]
Night Ramblings [link]
Spilt Milk, Part One [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Two [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Three [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Four [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Five [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Six [link]
Spilt Milk, Part Seven [link]
A Single Candle [link]
The Dark Snitch [link]
Blue Satin [link]
Rosura [link]
Rosura, Part Two [link]
Rosura, Part Three [link]
Rosura, Part Four [link]
Rosura, Part Five [link]
Rosura, Part Six [link]
Rosura, Part Seven [link]
Where the Action Is [link]
Rosura, Part Eight [link]
Splintered [link]
Torn [link]
The Green-Eyed Monster [link]
The Corona [link]
Professor Caladrius [link]
Divination [link]
The Plan [link]
Furious Calm [link]
Full Fathom Five [link]
The Descent, Part One [link]
The Descent, Part Two [link]
A Taste of Things to Come [link]
A Taste of Thing to Come II [link]
Curly Hair, Feathers and Flame [link]
The Porcelain Bitch [link]
A Little Corner of Paradise [link]
A Means to Nothing [link]
A Beautiful Accident [link]
Less Broken [link]
Two Romantic Reunions [link]
Constructive Agony [link]
White in the Moon [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part One [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part Two [link]
Lily and the Unicorn, Part 3 [link]
Monochrome [link]
Foe Fire [link]
Jaded [link]
Possession [link]
A Wife, a Mother, and a Corpse [link]
Damage Limitation [link]
The Viceberg [link]
The Cavalry [link]
Otherworldly [link]
The Thaw [link]
The Angel in the Ice [link]
The Loose End [link]
Spinning Plates [link]
Spinning Plates, Part Two [link]
The Fall [link]
The Rise [link]
Sympathetic Magic [link]
Once Upon a Time [link]
The Soulless Redhead [link]
Happily Ever After [link]
Sanctuary [link]
Never, Never, Never Land [link]
Day and Night [link]
Smoke [link]
Shades of Red [link]
The Man who Lived [link]

And stories that aren't really part of the main plot yet, but hopefully will be someday, when I get my ass in gear:

Always Winter, Never Christmas [link]
Potions [link]
The Goddess of Death [link]
The Goddess of Waking [link]

I think I may have gone kind of over-board with the features this month. I went through all 68 pages of my favourites (I think I was trying to avoid working on the new chapter!) So, this is another gallery of inspirations – just art-works that remind me of the characters and relationships in my story (JK Rowling’s characters and relationships, I should say - I should be always saying it, but I'm afraid I forget. Would that stand up in a court of law, do you think? "I forget, your honour, I'm a bit dense, that's not against the law is it? Look, I made you a friendship bracelet... No, that's definitely not an attempt at bribing you! I'm lonely as well as dense, OK?").

Anyway, these art-works really inspired and encouraged me – they made me think not only that life was worth living, but that it was full of so many beautiful things that I’d actually burst if I didn’t start trying to write them down.

I also wanted to thank from the bottom of my heart for her beautiful illustration to my story (she won’t like me using the word beautiful about Severus Snape, but I can’t help it!) Her portrait of Severus with his dark wings unfolding behind him is just perfect for that scene – so darkly atmospheric and full of panicky lines and shadows. He looks so skinny and white and almost undead that it makes me shiver!



Here are some other Sev/Lily inspirations:



And some Narcissa inspirations, for good measure!